Adam Third Wheel Torres
by ramen-is-my-drug
Summary: When his parents are out for a Friday night, Adam Torres looks forward to a bittersweet time of video games, that is until Drew decides to bring Bianca over. Little does Adam know this is the start of an awkward, to say the least, adventure.


**A/N: Only under parody/humor because it's very light-hearted, not sure if you'll laugh until you piss. Also, there is definitely some mature content in here and I didn't rate it M because it's not exactly.. well, smut. You have been warned and I hope you like it, even with keeping in mind those factors. **

**10:27 pm**

I waited outside in the dark night as I sent the text message of my arrival. I would've knocked on my friend's door but it's after eleven so that wouldn't exactly be the most courteous. But so are the events I witnessed tonight. Actually, they're more than not being courteous. They are incredibly terrible experiences that could be pulled out of a raunchy comedy starring Michael Cera as me. He'd be what he usually plays, the awkward fellow who has funny one-liners pertaining to the situation he's in. Except, he wouldn't get the hot girl in the end because Adam Torres doesn't get babes.

The door opened to find a surprisingly awake Tristan, with green mush all over his face. The same I saw Fiona done earlier today. He smiled as he quickly let me in into his lighted house. It definitely seemed like a nice setting to be raised in. Perfectly placed furniture, nicely decorated items on mahogany shelves, traditional paintings on the wall was the essence of the Milligans' living room. It was practically like walking into my own house.

"Do you want something to eat? You looked starved," Tristan offered. My stomach definitely needed some nourishment but it was already rude enough to come at this hour.

"No thanks," I said.

"Don't you dare try to be polite. I was about to make popcorn and I could easily put in some Totino's pizza rolls. Owen could do without the bachelor food anyway," Tristan insisted.

"Okay. But I'll make them. I'm definitely capable considering that's one of the food groups in Drew's meals. That, and spray cheese," I admitted as Tristan cracked a smile.

"I swear, jocks can be so disgusting,"

"Eh, I'm fine with it. Anyway, are your parents' asleep?" I finally asked as we walked into the kitchen.

"They're out on their monthly dinner dates. They would usually be back at this time. Whatever, means I can watch Klaine's absolutely adorable duets as loud as I want. You don't mind right?" Tristan asked as he handed be the frozen box of Totino's.

"I've never even heard of that term. But your house, your rules. Do you want to microwave the popcorn first, or-"

"You can go first. Gives me more time for my pores to clear, and for us to chat. I kind of would like an explanation as to why you're here at ten thirty. I don't usually get visitors until midnight," he joked.

"Where do I even start?" I hesitated.

"The beginning would be nice," Tristan answered.

"Well, it all started when I was at my house…"

**6:04 pm**

When my parents told me they were going to visit a friend who is touring in the NYC for the weekend, I was extremely content. Not because I was expecting to throw some insane party that would be _legendary _until I became a middle-aged man. But because I could slay in _Diablo II_ as long as I wanted to without my mom asking me to turn down the volume. Until my X-Box 360 decided to show its red ring of death at the perfect timing. Also, Drew having his own plans at our house, without telling me in advance.

"Fuck, Bianca!" he moaned loudly in the next room. He's been whining like a whale for the past several minutes as I've been trying to play League of Legends in my room. Why couldn't the days be simpler when all he did was make out with a girl? Why did Bianca have to fulfill schoolboy fantasies, _now? _Couldn't they have waited until I was at least pretending to be asleep like civilized people?

"Does that take you down memory lane from the Boiler Room?" Bianca asked ever so seductively. It will always bewilder me on why she's with such a _derp_. This is the same guy who only ate the marshmallows in Lucky Charms because he thought the rest were cat food. I love my brother but out of all the guys at our school, she stuck with him?

"Y-yes!" he gave out a twelve-year old girl cry. By now, I would drowning out their sexy time with my headphones but the thing was… my iPod was in _his _room. Since we both know I'm the one with better taste in music, he begged me for him to borrow my iPod so he could impress Bianca with it. It obviously seemed to have worked. But it was bad on my part to not have taken the earphones out beforehand.

"And that's just my _mouth,_"

That's it. It is my cue to leave. It actually has been for the minute Bianca entered our house but I thought she'd leave the rated M escapades in her car for the sake of the lonely little brother. But I'm sure once she heard "My parents will be gone for the weekend," come out of Drew's mouth, all her sentiments went out the door. On the bright side, I have an excuse to emergency call one of my friends. It was either phoning friends or going to the movies to see _Woman in Black _or _Chronicle_. Since my phones downstairs, also, that gives me another excuse to make a run to the refrigerator. Friends it is then. It's like killing two birds with one stone.

The first one would be none other than my partner in crime, Eli.

_You have reached the Goldsworthy Bros Morturar- _I finally hung up on his fake voicemail after I was sent to it for the seventh time. Looks like there won't be any hardcore gaming tonight. All hope wasn't lost, though.

I went to Dave Turner's contact and started calling him. He picked up after a couple rings.

"Hey, how's it going homie?" he greeted. Strange as it is, he was the only one who could pull that term without sounding like a complete tool.

"Alright. Are you busy tonight?" I started.

"I was actually about to drop the girlfriend off before her parents start getting suspicious…"

_I have a name you know! It's not like Adam and I have never met before. _

"Oh, I'm sorry. My girlfriend, Alliah-I-am-so-anal-about-everything-Bhandari," he joked as giggles ensued from the infatuated couple. I waited patiently for them to stop as I took out my cup of noodles out of the microwave. "So, I'm pretty much free. Why, what's up?"

"Well, since my parents are gone, Drew brought Bianca over… and you know how they spend quality time," I heard a small laugh from my understanding friend.

"Of course. Do you need a place to crash?"

"Dude, that'd be awesome. I actually just got NBA 2K12, it's practically calling your all knowing basketball advice. Your family's cool with the last minute notice, right?" We both knew my last question really meant if they'd be okay with an FTM sleeping over. I met them a couple times during rehearsals at his house and on opening night, but not long enough for their reaction at my physical appearance.

"Oh yeah. That doesn't even come close to the shit I've pulled with my pops," Dave admitted. "Anyway, it'll be about fifteen minutes after I drop off Alli. You can kill a little bit of time,"

"You're talking to the king of procrastination."

**6: 54 pm**

The fifteen minutes turned into thirty minutes for the fact that I wanted to pick the best selection of X-Box games so we'd be entertained for hours. It was definitely well-spent time. He had a functioning X-Box but barely had any sufficient games due to the fact that he had a functioning love life so therefore, he didn't have as much spare time as me. I texted Dave about my delayed arrival but he didn't respond. I'm sure he could honestly care less. It'd give him more time to prolong his goodbye kiss to his beloved _Alliah_.

I finally drove there to see Dave's car running, lights on and music loud enough for me to make out who the artist was. Unsurprisingly, it was Drake. I knew the song, _The Night Off_, because it came from Bianca's album that would constantly play in her car when I bumped rides from her. It's a good thing I took time picking out those games, or else I could've stumbled myself into an awkward with his parents. No one wants to force a conversation with people you're unsure if they're even comfortable with you.

I ran up to Dave's car and thought it'd be perfectly fine to try to be humorous and get in his passenger seat. Little did I know the joke would be on me. I opened the door, ignoring the foggy windows, to find that someone had already filled the shotgun seat. She'd actually fill the front section of the car, her head bobbing up and down on Dave's lap. It only took a matter of seconds from Dave's suggestive facial expressions to understand the situation.

_Well, this is awkward. _

I wanted to take my eyes away from this disgusting image of witnessing the action my friend was getting. But I froze there, mouth agape. It was like a tragic car accident you see on the road, fighting against all rationalities by staring as you drive by. That's the only feeling I could compare it to. Dave noticed my presence, sharing the most unfortunate exchange of eye contact.

His gasp made Alli stop and make her genuinely ask, "What? Did I bite too hard?" His unresponsiveness made her directly turn around in his unshakeable eye contact. Her eyes started bugging out as well. After the brief moment of utter horrific eye contact, I finally closed the door. More like slamming it, the harder I exerted force, the more I'd repress the image of what I just witnessed.

I sprinted toward my car, already unlocking the doors and keys ready to go. You know, hearing the love noises of my brother and Bianca didn't seem so terrible after all. I'm not going to deny that I've never walked in on Drew a couple times… but he's gone no farther than over the clothes fondling. And at those instances, I was so used to Drew's charade that I had the ability to coolly walk away. But life didn't prepare me for Dave's groundbreaking moment.

During my mad dash, I heard the sound of the door open and Dave yell out, "A-adam, I'm sorry! I can explain-"

"Text me!" I called out before I got in the car and drove off. I didn't care where I was going. Just as long as it'd be far away from Dave and Alli. Possibly wherever Dr. Emmet Brown's house with his time machine was located.

**7: 12 pm**

A pack of gum, a large slurpee, and an apologetic text later, I realized I was only a couple blocks away from Eli's neighborhood. I might as well stop by and see if he's not dead or at least conjuring someone else's death for that matter. And if he wasn't, awesome. I still had a good selection of multiplayer RPG games that weren't going to go to waste. The worst rejection case scenario was his parents wouldn't allow me or Eli would be gone. So just to play it safe, I'll leave my night stuff in the car.

I knocked on the door and soon enough, Cece answered it.

"Adam! Such a nice surprise," Cece said as she let me in my second home

"Smells really good," I complimented as my mouth started to water.

"Why thank you. We're actually about to eat dinner. Did Eli invite you, too?" Cece asked.

"No, wait he invited-" _someone?_

I would've finished that sentence if it weren't for noticing Clare surprising me. That, and pasta splashing all over me. It happened all so fast, I could barely even take note of it. But the remains of hot creamy-sauced noodles dripping from my hair gave me the reminder. At least I'd be the first one tasting it.

"I am so sorry, Adam! I didn't even see you there!" Clare exclaimed as her and Cece started taking the pieces out of my hair.

"I kind of realized that, since you're not the type to cover friends with pasta," I said as the two laughed.

"I guess we'll be making another batch?" Clare said.

"You guess right. It'll give you a chance to shower all that gunk," Cece directed toward me. "I'll be sure to get a shirt of Eli's. You know where the towels are, right?"

"Yeah, thanks," I smiled as I started making my way upstairs. I would've told them about my own bag of clothes but I didn't want to think I had an assumption of sleeping over. "Where is Eli anyway?" I asked, turning around.

"He went with Bullfrog to get some bread. Can't have chicken marsala pasta without that," Cece remarked.

"Of course," I said as I continued my way.

Considering how many times I've been over at Eli's house, taking showers wasn't that big of a deal. I already knew which direction the knob would go from cold to hot. Unlike the first time, where I nearly turned into Torch with the amount of heat I accidentally summoned. Now I could manage to have my water lukewarm. Conveniently, there was an iPod plugged into the speaker in the bathroom. Curiously, I went through the artists of Taylor Swift, Colbie Caillat, Relient K, Ellie Goulding, Neon Trees, and hellogoodbye, to realize it belonged to none other than Clare Edward's. She even had _Call Me Maybe_.

I swear, the worst Canadian artists get the most popular. Justin Bieber. Carly Rae Jepsen. _Nickleback_. I wasn't even that big of a fan of Drake but I wasn't embarrassed that he represents Canada.

As I was mouthing the words and running my hands through my shampooed hair to the beat of _Animal_, I was pretty sure I heard a door creak. But I quickly nodded it off, for, even in this laid-back household, the Goldsworthy's would knock before entering. Even then so, it was probably Clare or Cece dropping off the extra t-shirt for me. I was rinsing off the shampoo, so I was quite blind and vulnerable to my surroundings right now. Perfect time to have an irremovable memory, huh?

That's when the shower door opened.

To this, my lids immediately flew open, unwanted shampoo getting in them. The irritation made me scream as I turned around to face Eli. Sadly, suds burning my eyes, I still managed to have seen everything. His lanky body. Eli Jr in full force. The utter shock we felt as we shared eye contact. The realization that I wasn't his curvy girlfriend, that I now found he shared shower routines with, but his best friend. His best friend's most obvious feminine features showcased. The noises that erupted from our throats at this shock.

_Well, this is awkward. _

This time, I wasn't the one running. He was.

After he forcefully, like I did with Dave's car, shut the shower door, he was gone in an instant. I've never seen a human being bolt quicker out of a situation than this moment. It's a shame Eli was never into sports. He just proved himself to have a lot of potential as a sprinter. The exercises his therapist recommended seemed to have worked in terms of speed.

_Slam. _

I quickly went back to washing out the residue that bubbled in my eyes, relieving some pain. After much rinsing, the stinging now went to a bearable minimum. I no longer had to worry about being blind. As expected, there was another knock on the door which didn't startle to me this time.

"Adam, it's Clare. Are you alright in there?" she kindly asked through the door. I decided to turn off the water. Suddenly, cleaning out pasta sauce didn't seem to matter.

"Yeah. Thought I saw a spider. Sorry," I lied.

"Oh, that's reasonable. Alright, well, I have Eli's shirt if you still need it. How do you want to do this exchange?"

I wasn't sure if she actually bought my excuse or she was pretending to. I honestly didn't care. All I wanted to do was get dry and clothed then get out of here as soon as damn possible. I didn't even want to see Eli's face, that's how traumatic this experience was. Hell, it wouldn't even bother me if I didn't see the guy for a couple weeks.

"Uh, you can just throw it," I said as the door quickly open, the shirt soaring across the floor. The door opened and closed so fast, the heat from the hot water couldn't even escape. "Thanks, Clare."

"Sure thing. Eli and Mr. Goldsworthy just came home. Before we eat dinner, Eli wants to talk to you in his room. It seems pretty urgent," Clare hinted. She definitely knew. Freakin' great. Did he give the update to his parents, too?

"Fine, let me get dressed first,"

"What's the point? I-I-uh mean of course. Of course! That makes perfect sense. It'd be totally weird if you guys saw each other naked," she stuttered.

"Thank you for the reminder!" I retorted.

"But, figuratively speaking, say you did, it shouldn't affect your friendship because the greatest of friends overcome obstacles like that-"

"Can I please just get changed?"

"Yeah, of course. Sorry," she said as I heard her scurry away.

At times like these, I hated my closest friends dating. It made humiliating moments such as these so much worse because of the fact they were both shacking up. Which meant whatever horrific

After I dried and clothed myself, I noticed there were still more clothing items. _Eli's _clothing items.

The ridiculous red scarf. The typical black shirt. The military jacket. The tighter than Clare's pants. The silver jewelry on the counter. They screamed, "Look, I'm non-conforming Elijah Goldsworthy!"

Then it hit me.

He was so desperate to get out of the crime scene that he didn't even bother to take along his evidence. In other words, he ran out butt naked. Now I knew one more fun fact about my friend. And I thought knowing the length of his anatomy part was enough.

Ten minutes later I walked myself to Eli's room. The door was closed, though. No way in hell am I going to put myself into another terrible situation. I knocked on the door.

"You can come in, Adam," I heard Clare's voice say.

I walked in to find the two on Eli's bed, both waiting for my presence. Eli's knees were hunched up to his chest. I couldn't even sum up enough courage to look at him in the eye. Clare was the only who seemed to be the one cancelling out the nervous energy in the room. Well, she wasn't the one who _unintentionally _saw the other one naked.

"You guys are going to have to share eye contact at some point. Might as well do it now," she urged as I sat on her side of the bed.

"I beg to differ," Eli said.

"I second that," I added.

"At some point, this can happen. Don't act like you guys are a special case. I've seen Alli and Jenna naked plenty of times," Clare started.

"But you've never mistook them for your lover!" I cried. "I mean, I know I'm physically a girl but I certainly do not have your girlfriend's knockers."

"Adam!" Eli interrupted in shock to my honest description of Clare's body.

In that moment, I involuntarily made eye contact with the guy. And let me tell you, it was frightening. Just looking at his face gives you that much closer of an image. An image of Eli's… _gross_.

We immediately cringed and went back to staring in opposite directions. I was always annoyed of the skull that plastered his door. But now it didn't seem all that bad.

"Look, I'm sorry, I can't handle this. I'm really sorry for intruding for dinner. I'll just leave and go back to listening to the humping of Drew and Bianca," I verbally vomited as I got up.

"Adam, wait," Eli said. I stopped, but refused to turn around. "What gave you the idea to come over anyway? You usually call."

"I was just in the neighborhood and I did, _seven _times. And the longer I'm here, the more I vision your shlong so please let me refrain from this mental torture," I begged.

"This wouldn't have happened if had you locked the bathroom door," Eli argued.

"Sorry for thinking I could cleanse safely in your house. Didn't know an unlocked door was codeword for come in and do me well in the ass."

"Adam! That's enough!" Clare yelled.

"I'm sorry, Clare. That was honestly uncalled for," I apologized quickly as I gave her glance.

"I'll call Fiona and see if you could crash at her place," Eli sighed.

At most times, I would hate being someone's pity case. This wasn't one of those times.

"Okay," I smiled, still facing the door.

"You can also crash at my place. I'll just be sure to notify Jake. On the bright side, my mom got him an X-Box for his birthday. You have his number, right?"

I knew they wanted me out of here. I knew they were just sending me off to potential playdates so they could fondle each other some more. If it was a natural occurrence that Eli could just jump into the shower with his new girlfriend…_ new thought, new thought. _

"Yeah," I quickly answered, as if it'd erase the image. "Wait, you're not going back to your place? How'd you get that arranged?"

"Said I was sleeping over at Alli's. Alli and Jenna said they were sleeping over at mine. Except Jenna's with Luke and Alli-"

"Is occupied with Dave," I finished resentful.

**8:01**

It didn't take me long to find Fiona's apartment, thanks to Eli's "hormonal" adventure to her pad. And considering the amount of times I went there when we were dating, I had the place pretty much mapped out. I decided to go to Fiona's instead of Jake's due to the fact that it's her place and I wouldn't wake up anyone else. That being said, it was a letdown that I wouldn't be able to play any of my games. Twenty-thousand dollars worth of clothes and not even a Playstation or X-Box?

A few knocks later, Fiona opened the door. She was in a bathrobe, her face in that same green shit my mom uses.

"Hello, come in. Sorry for the avocado mask, I didn't know you'd walk here so fast," Fiona admitted as she led me to her couch. Some black and white film was in still motion, revealing a crying woman.

"I drove here," I said.

"Oh, you got your license?"

"Yeah, passed the test a couple weeks ago. Realized how convenient life is when you have easy transportation. Did I interrupt your movie?"

"Oh, psh, you're fine. It's just about ending anyway. Besides, I've seen this movie so many times, I practically know the lines," she assured as she changed the channel. "Do you want to watch something?"

"No thanks. Actually, do you mind if I crash? It's been a pretty eventful night," I posed.

"Of course. You can sleep in my room actually. My roommate, Charlie, is out partying with some friends and she won't be back until the morning. It'd probably be more comfortable for her to see me sleeping on the couch than a perfect stranger," she explained. "No offense."

"Ah, none taken. That's actually really considerate of you," I said.

That name definitely rang a bell. I remember Eli telling me about a Charlie in Fiona's life. She was her girlfriend. That's right. How did Imogen feel about that? Well, that's definitely none of my business to pry about. Besides, I already gotten enough of relationship drama with Eli, my brother, and Dave. In fact, I was surrounded by relationship drama. Just not in one.

That's outright depressing.

"Adam?" I finally got out of my tangent of thought.

"Yeah? Sorry, I was spacing out,"

"I'm used to it. Imogen does the same thing all the time. I was just asking if you needed a toothbrush or some facewash, perhaps?" she offered.

"I'm good. But thanks anyway. I'm practically ready for bed, credit going to Clare's wardrobe at Eli's," I referred to the baggy pants and college sweatshirt. I didn't even have my wrap. That's how badly I wanted to leave the Goldsworthy residence as soon as possible.

"Figures as much. I know you wouldn't be caught dead wearing a military jacket and hip-breaking jeans," she smiled. "What happened anyway? I mean, Eli seemed so hasty to find you a place from his call."

"It's a long and uncomfortable story," I emphasized.

"You can explain it to me over croissants and cappuccinos in the morning. That's how you'll repay your debt for coming on such short notice," she winked.

**9:31 pm**

I realized how quickly I dozed off into sleep when I woke up. Unfortunately, I didn't wake up under the most pleasant of circumstances. No sunlight escaping through the blinds. No sounds of Fiona's soothing voice. No smell of breakfast like Fiona had promised. Instead, it was still completely pitch black. There was a soft tone of someone's voice. One small problem, a girl was on top of me. I only knew that because my hand was on what I presumed would be her boob.

"That woke you up, didn't it?" she whispered in my ear, her breath sending jitters throughout my body. "I decided to give you a little surprise. Plus, your rough hand feels so good. My turn."

Her hand was now going under my sweatshirt and on my chest. This was definitely something I've dreamt about since I knew the term "sexual fantasies" but this was all wrong.

"Your breasts shrank! How is that possible?" she squealed.

To make matters worse, the door opened and the lights were turned on. We quickly looked over to the source to find Fiona, in her nightgown, utterly shocked. Our eyes landed back on each other, revealing Imogen Moreno in a sheer red nighty. Everything happened so fast, the thought of the intruder being Fiona's girlfriend didn't even pass my mind.

_Well, this is awkward. _

I did the most mature thing a person can do in a situation such as this, scream and run away. Imogen did the same as I, minus the running. She just jumped off of me, absolutely horrified. I grabbed my shoes and phone, apologized to a confused Fiona, and continued screaming as I bolted out of the apartment.

Jake's house it is.

**9:58 pm**

Before I swung to Jake's house, I took a trip to the gas station. My tank was nearly empty, due to all the driving around the suburbs of Toronto. I should've just gone to the movies solo. I'd rather be on the edge of my seat with the Harry Potter actor than witness what I had to witness tonight. At least Jake gave me the a-okay about crashing at his place.

I had to text him, though, as I reached the front porch. One thing about conservative parents is their strict bedtime. I would know because the same thing goes with mine.

The door opened very quietly as the moonlight shined on a very alert Jake Martin. He silently led me up the stairs and into Clare's room. I guess he figured I was tired from my text on how Fiona's place didn't exactly work out. There was truth to that but he treated me like I was a hotel guest. If that's the case, then I shouldn't have brought my backpack full of games.

"I'm not sure when the girls will be back so just keep that in mind," Jake warned.

"I will,"

"And if you need anything beforehand, just knock on the door. Quietly," he said.

"Of course," I nodded as he started walking out. Suddenly he stopped to add jokingly, "Oh, and no searching through my sister's panties now. I know how you Torres roll."

"Considering she's my best friend's girlfriend, that's highly unlikely," I remarked.

"Good point," he concluded as he closed the door.

As I attempting to adjust myself in Clare's bed several times, I realized I couldn't sleep. Maybe subconsciously, I was expecting some girl to sneak into the room and let me fondle her. But it was doubtful due to the relationship statuses of Jenna, Alli, and Clare. It was even more so since their types didn't exactly scream FTM.

Well, Jake did say I could if I needed anything. Hopeful, I grabbed my backpack and found myself tapping on his door. I heard the shuffling of feet in the room, making me feel guilty. I wasn't sure what Jake was doing but it seemed like I interrupted _something_. Finally, the door opened as he forced a smile.

"Hey, what's up?" he greeted in his boxers and bare chest. It was that hot in his room?

"I was just wondering if you wanted to play…" my eyes couldn't help but trail past Jake's head and what was seen in his room. The scattered clothes. The poster of Emma Stone of his wall. _A leopard thong_.

"Wanted to play, what?"

"Where is she?" I got straight to the point. The guilt immediately spread over his face.

"What do you mean?" he tried to cover up with a smile.

"Explain the female undergarment," I referred.

"There are no female undergarment, crazy. _Not so loud_," he whispered as he let me in his room and closed the door. Shortly after, he grabbed the panties and threw it under the covers.

"So, can I meet this lucky girl?" I asked.

"You can come out," Jake finally said as the closet opened with Katie. Her toned body being nicely revealed in her black panties.

"Didn't know animal print was your thing," I subconsciously added. From everything I've endured tonight, there was no longer a censor from my thoughts to my mouth. But Katie didn't either.

"God, no. I would never wear animal print," she informed.

"Oh, so are they Jake's?" I humored as the two turned beat red. It took me a while before I realized the horrible discovery I made with my sarcastic question.

_Well, this is awkward. _

"I'm out of here," I announced.

"Don't be like that. There's a perfectly vacant bed that you can sleep in," Katie persuaded.

"Sleep? With you guys fornicating in the one next door? I'll just be starting from square one all over again. Except this time, the mental image of you in a thong will only add to Drew's whaling moans, Dave's orgasm expression, Eli's raging boner, and Imogen lacy red underwear! Sorry, but no thank you," I concluded as I walked out of the room.

"Actually, the last one isn't so bad," I heard Jake say before I closed the door. How Katie reacted, I don't know. But I'm sure it wasn't exactly a kind one.

I had one last hope or else it'd be a campout in the beat up station wagon.

**10: 55 pm**

"Damn. Thank God for Anya joining the army and Owen's lack of sex appeal with the majority of the female population. Or else I'd have to endure that," Tristan commented as I took one last bite of my Totino's pizza rolls.

"And I thought watching Jenna cuddle it up with Luke was unbearable. But seeing Eli in his birthday suit makes me reevaluate," Becky added as she grabbed a handful of the popcorn. She came from downstairs, mid-story, so I couldn't ask of her existence. But now was the perfect opportunity.

"No offense, Becky, but why are you here?"

"Why? Do you have any objections?" she raised an eyebrow.

"Of course not. But I mean, I thought you would. Considering you are publicly against Eli's play because of the 'alternative lifestyle' that was incorporated," I explained, making Tristan shift uncomfortably in his seat. The pink elephant had to be revealed in the room.

"Well, I know we had our fallout in the beginning but then I realized Jesus taught us to love everyone equally. Besides, it's hard to come across someone who loves show choir, Broadway, and theater," she smiled to Tristan.

"Aren't they all the same thing?" I asked as they both gasped, "…just kidding."

"She's like the Quinn Fabray to my Blaine Anderson. And you can be Kurt Hummel. Except, we're obviously not dating, you're not gay, and she's not pregnant," Tristan winked.

"Um, okay?" I said.

"That's it. You're watching _Glee_, pronto," Tristan commanded as Becky grabbed the popcorn and Tristan grabbed my hand. "We can also gossip about how annoying our jock brothers are."

"Speaking of which, where is yours? Does he even know I'm here?" I posed as we made our way toward the stairs.

"No, he's out at some house party," Tristan answered.

"The same one my brother's hosting," Becky muttered. "Which is why I'm here. I do not want to be held accountable if my parents decide to come home early. Although, I kind of wish I was there. So I could stop my brother from sinning with Jenna once again."

"And how exactly do you do that?" Now I was curious. Maybe, she could give me some pointers with Drew.

"Well…"

**11:07 am **

"Drew… I'm leaving. I can't do this anymore…"

"Aw, come on. Why not?"

"I cannot be pleasured when Christian music is blasting from your brother's room!"

**Thank you for taking the time to read this, even with Adam's stream of consciousness. I hope you enjoyed it! Please share any thoughts on this oneshot. :) **

**ps who's excited for Adam/Maya/Zig/Imogen/Mo band and a Chaz Bono appearance? **


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